Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Starting Over.....

So I've been going back and forth as to whether I should blog about this and I decided I should. I should because people will get it if my office door is closed more often the next week or so. I should so that I don't have to tell everyone separately. And mostly I should because nobody ever talks about it.

This weekend I had a miscarriage. We were expecting our first little one and had only told family as we didn't want to tell the world until we were out of the "danger zone" (1st trimester). We were scheduled to go in yesterday for our 7-8 week initial appointment, but on Sunday we went to the ER when I started spotting and cramping (sorry if that is TMI) and between Sunday and our appointment yesterday we lost it.

I think for me so far it's still setting in. It's still setting in when I woke up this morning and remembered I'm not pregnant anymore. It set in last night when I took a sip of wine at dinner and got teary eyed because I didn't think I'd be having a glass of wine for another 7 months.

On the bright side (for lack of a better phrase) we were told that we can start trying again right away and I seem to be (physically) bouncing back quickly and that it's not likely to happen again. 

So I guess my goal for today is to let all the mommies who've been through it or will go through it someday know that it's totally ok to get a little sad when you see a pregnant lady at the grocery store, or to shut the door and cry for a minute or 2 for no reason other than you just feel sad. Know that when people tell you that "everything happens for a reason" and "it just wasn't your time" or "you can try again" they are saying it because they love you and they have no idea what else to say. And even though that doesn't make it hurt any less it is in fact, true.

It also reminds me to continue to pray fervently for friends of ours who are currently expecting, for friends who have had to experience this same heartache of miscarriage time and time again, for friends who have had to experience the heartache of infertility, and for friends who have had to experience the unimaginable loss of a child.

Sorry if I was a Debbie-downer today but I just had to get that out. It's my blog and today I'm a sad panda.  If you need a post-depressing-blog pick me up...I highly recommend this.......





I'll let you know Friday how our first week of March Madness went.

10 comments:

  1. I admire your strength and look forward to hearing good news soon!

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  2. May God Himself prepare your womb to bring forth life! You are beautiful and full og grace. I grieve with you for your loss.

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  3. Love you and praying for you!!

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  4. God I love you Adrienne. I don't think you realize how much I look up to you, and admire you. You and Lis are kinda the older sisters that I never got to have. Your strength inspires me daily. xxoo

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  5. There are no words.
    I am so sorry.
    Many prayers. Time will heal.
    Love, Lee Anne

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  6. I'm so sorry - please know that I will be praying for both you and Daniel.

    Thanks for your faithful blogging - I don't post responses very often, but you have a voice that I respect and admire. I appreciate your sharing from the heart like that.

    Oh - and thanks for sharing the video, he was precious! Little guys are so honest!!

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  7. I am so sorry. I admire you so much for sharing this with us. I know that you and Daniel will be blessed with many beautiful children!! Sending prayers your way.

    xoxo

    Megan Gonzalez

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  8. I'm praying for you. Look up 2 Corinthians 1:3-7. Hope it brings you comfort and peace. Love you.

    Hayley

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  9. Love you Age! Thinking about you and Dan during this time. God's perfect timing can be hard to deal with sometimes. Praying for you!

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  10. I'm so sorry Adrienne, there really is nothing to say in a time like this, but know that I'm just a few blocks away and am always willing to lend an ear or shoulder.

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